Went back anyway

I managed to decide to continue in my program, despite the religiousity that bothers me.  I am sitting in the office that used to be my dad’s gf’s bedroom, and I think one of the cats peed on some item, I can smell it.  And I will literally have to take the whole room apart to find and fix the problem!

I’M SO ANGRY AT MYSELF FOR LETTING THAT DAMNED CAT HAVE KITTENS THAT I COULD NOT PLACE!

 

And I have work to do for school tomorrow and really, I’m simply pissed at the whole problem set I have now.  My dad’s dog Trixie is a problem personality just like my little Chester.  She’s about 45 pounds and Chester is less than 10 and he tries to beat up on her!  Which she responds to by attacking him.  I keep her in Daddy’s bedroom most of the time, and that works, but it’s a miserable situation.  She also just attacked my pomeranian Annie, to try and get her treat.  I do not like angry dogs and I’m miserable with what the personality defects of one dog can do to the whole pack.  I have a set of small dogs and their personalities range from sweet to ferocious.  I didn’t know it but the little ones all have this larger than life take on the world, and that means they scrap!  I don’t want any of them to fight and I can’t seem to stop the personality problems I have in the pack.  Trixie was just the icing on the cake.  A little after midnight on November 13th, Friday the 13th, Trixie and Chester went to war.  I had to get up three times to break them up and now, well, it’s all lockdown for Trixie to make sure I have no fights that might hurt me.  I’m so upset!  Why did my dad’s girlfriend not take Trixie with her?  Trixie was her dog with my dad!  So, I had two more pets dumped on me, when I moved into the house.  The one consolation I have here is that I don’t have to share the house.

 

My brother owns a share of the house and isn’t’ supposed to be allowed access to it until he becomes treated for the homicidal thoughts he express towards me.  “I wanna put her in a hole in the ground.”  This is what spurred my dad to do a TDO, just before he did his lung surgery.  My mom blows hot and cold over what she thinks about his condition, if he’s “normal” again, or still the guy who took Paxil and became a schizo at age 38, or if he’s crazy because he’s like my dad.  I finally saw him once, but my guess is that I won’t ever see him again until he’s dead, or I am.  He’s so damned childish, but it’s in my best interest to stay away, and unless my mother kicks him out, well, I don’t think I’ll have any problem.  I will likely have problems with Wildra.  She blows hot and cold over whether she wants to be trustee or not.  And she plays word games.  I gave up my voucher, over the whole deal that I could live here.  I am not going to tolerate any more manipulations on her part.  I have an attorney in the wings and waiting to make sure my rights are enforced.

 

 

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