Wreck of the day

My classwork is coming to an end for the semester.  I want to change schools because my program demands that I travel to it, and I don’t want to even think of flying anywhere.  And the panic attacks and higher elevations are known to be a problem, so, I am looking for other places.  The problem?  My budget yearly for this school is 36,500.00 dollars.  I can’t afford one dime more, and everywhere else is more expensive!  The one school on the coast I’ve been looking at has tuition of 26 k!  This does not include books, or any other expenses.  So, I still have the problem with both travel, and the problem of accreditation issues, which the school says will be resolved in Spring 18, but I am not sure of it, or what kind of risk that means for me.

Also, some kinds of crazy people scare me.  What do I do if I get a client who frightens me?  Some borderline, passive aggressive, and antisocial personality disordered people just freak me out.  Also a narcissist too, what doI do?  I don’t want to work with severely disabled clients, what I would prefer is to work with people who have been hurt, and who need help trying to get back to their lives in a successful fashion.  Watching the court cases, I’ve seen tons of people who’s lives are in a shambles because someone did something to them.  I’d like to deal with those people.

Uggghhh, back to the news….

Counselor Education

I go to the world’s cutest online school.  I know, I know, my alma mater is the grand old lady of the South, and quite the historical piece of Georgian architecture, but my current school is just, well, cute.  I didn’t go to Pre-practicum.  Despite the school’s cuteness, it’s also on accreditation probation.  And since I’m in Grad School, well, that means I can’t just take all my credits and walk away.  I decided, since I’m battling some issues other than school, that I’d just stay out of it completely until Spring 18, to see if it even exists any longer.  I know it will be a brick and mortar school, but it’s online presence is in danger.  And since I have 18 credits there after this summer, I simply have to wait it out or risk losing even more money!

So, I’ve got opinions about counselor ed.  First, I don’t work in the field already, which many people do.  And perhaps if I did my lessons would just be solidifying what I’ve already experienced, but NO, it’s all new to me.  I can spend years reading true crime in the papers and coming to conclusions about the perps, and dealing with friends and family, but the counselor ed program is different.

How so you say?  Well, first of all many of the classes are overviews of parts of the field of counseling.  Take for example, this summer class in addiction studies.  Well, it’s an over view, and a brief one, of what people experience in the field.  What kind of clients they see (“Almost 25 percent of clients in the chair have some kind of addiction or usage experience or issue.”)  what kind of meaning does the ability to become addicted to a substance, and to pick one up and start using it have (“Is it all the medical model, brain studies and neuroscience, or it it something, biopsychosocial, and very much broader?”)  and how to get your clients to cure themselves by managing to be unaddicted, and is it even possible?  No one textbook could ever encompass all that, nor the experience of one counselor.  So, we do research in counseling psychology to see what other counselors have experienced.

Right now I’m so tired.  My finger is hurting, the one I got the splinter under the nail that got infected about 6 weeks ago.  The last few days it’s been acting as if it’s broken.  So I’m seeing my doctor tomorrow.  I have the mucosal cysts on my fingers from the arthritis I got a year of so after my wrist surgery.  And my doc has been warning me time and again that if the fingers get infected for any reason, then I could be at risk for extremely grave medical issues.  And the finger was infected but the pain now, shouldn’t be there.  So, off I go tomorrow.  Pray for me please, it’s scary to get ill with my age, living alone, and all the other things.

There is a storm outside and my dogs have all come into the bedroom I made my office, and they’re all on the bed.  It’s so cute!  Rose is only 7 months old, she’s a St. Bernard puppy, and about 90 lbs the last vet visit a week ago.  And everyone else is a little dog.  She steps on my feet, gets in my way, and I really wonder how it’s going to go?  She’s way bigger than what I’m used to in my house!  She barks or chirps when she wants me to pet her, which she’s doing now, so let me go.


3 cats stolen, neighbor suspected, my challenge is finding forgiveness

Being Christian is a challenge when people do things that aren’t expected, such as kidnapping cats.  If I can find out who did it, I can charge them.  If not, I can’t.  I don’t believe it’s anyone but my next door neighbors.  And the heart of my hearts pet cat, Chip, is gone.  I am so distressed.

When is a good time to have someone do something so awful to you?  This week I have two papers due and I’m already late in getting things written and read.  I have to get good grades in both papers, I don’t have any choice.  And I don’t have any time to actively be upset, no crying, no mourning, I have to work.



Skates on, stroke, forward!

I have two papers and two exams due on the 7th of next month, and no energy to attack them.  I’m so dismissive here, on what I’m doing, that I really think I should stop before I finish as I’ve not even done half of it and I’m seriously in debt and the job market looks rougher than ever.  My weight gain over the last 20 years and my age, make me an unusual hire, and I’m now guessing that the news I should have taken from the last attempts at job hunting, is that I’m no longer a favorite.  Older women are not as prized as younger ones, I get that.  But it’s actually true that older women are smarter than their younger counterparts, and more experienced with people and life.


What to do with a counseling masters?  I have to get as many A’s as possible to make sure no one has any excuse to say no to licensure.  I can see it now, told no to a license to practice and then having to move to any state that will accept me?  I like where I am.

**nods head at drama**  It’s not really going to go wrong, will it?

Lemony Snicket

I have a whole small spiral notebook of odd sightings at my home, and out when I am shopping.  I got stopped for a ticket Wednesday, coming out of Best Buy, and I’m thinking that it’s odd that I was stopped that way.  I mean, I did run a right on red, red light that was marked no right on red.  The signs are visible during the day, but at night aren’t very visible at all.  So, I would like to call Chesterfield county and see if that officer was on the county time clock, or someone else’s.  But it’s not a good idea, really.

I don’t know if it’s really a cop, or if it’s someone else parading as a cop, and eventually he’s going to put me in a car, drive me somewhere, and rape and murder me.  This person drives a white Lincoln Mercury type sedan, has tinted windows and I believe it’s a he, and he is really big and bulky.  I thought they fired or retired cops who got too fat?  He was outside of Martins on Forest Hill, in the city last night.  I was inside, getting groceries, and he was outside only one spot over from  my car.  When I saw him, I went back inside to ask the manager to walk me to my car.  And as I walked back outside, he was driving off.  I didn’t have that camera that I purchased to get a license plate.  So, I pointed to the car as it was driving off and the manager went back inside.

I’m sure the manager thought it was kind of strange.  And so do I.  I don’t have any legal woes that I know of, but I’ve met so many really bad personalities being on the disability, and while I guess that should not be, for me it’s been just so.  I think what happens, is that people get that you’re on a slide down the social scale, and it brings out the bully in bullies.  They sense it’s hard to defend yourself, and that’s the way it ends, with people hurting you.  And the people you knew and loved at work and in that safe, well cared for neighborhood?  They’re all gone.   That’s why I’m trying hard to get back out there, and do something with the few years I have left to work.

I’ve got to go.  I decided to report what has been  happening to the person on call about last nights sighting.  lemonysnicket