Quiet except for school

I’ve had no problems except school.  I’ve only seen one stalker, and that was really a question in my mind still.  It’s really troubling that anyone would stalk me, anywhere.  I have quit going out to certain places where I no longer feel safe.  So the dollars I gave to them go to online shopping.  I think it was time for that anyway.  So many people do online shopping now.  I find everything online except clothing, which I still have to order and try on.  I’ve gotten subscription boxes to fix the wardrobe embellishments I need.

It’s hard for me to deal with the uncertainties caused by the problems in the family that have spilled over into my latest school assignment, a genogram.  Nobody knows all the birthdays and dates of death, and I barely know the names of some family members, it’s that large.  And the brunt of the problem is I only have a relationship with four family members now.  One of those family members is a prong of the family that has extreme problems with their interworkings and might be sociopathic.  Drunks, bipolar, extreme panic, the theft of a house left for five people by one person, and all the things that go on.

With events in the news, the FBI isn’t telling us the complete truth, according to at least one eyewitness.  That person said they felt there were at least 3 to 5 shooters down on the horizontal at the Las Vegas concert shooting.  And that the agency was threatening people to stay silent.  I don’t know the source personally and I don’t know if any of that is true.  But the LVPD Chief is changing the timeline for the shootings.  That is unusual.  Typically the news media can count on relatively accurate information within 24 hours.  This is a new wrinkle.  But I don’t know anything concrete.  We’re just going to have to wait and see what comes up.

I came up with someone from an online photo who looked like the Zodiac killer.  Interestingly enough, I doubt he’d be someone anybody would ever suspect, and I could only psychologically profile him as someone who might have some anger at women.

My psychology coursework is taking priority over everything.  I took today off to simply relax, but tomorrow I’m back to the grindstone to see how I am going to draw the genogram and have it reflect my family.  With dates!


Black Mass

I could write a book about these stupid mass shootings and the characters who perpetrate them!  First, this one seems to be the work of a lone gunman.  He had an associate with him, a girlfriend, and there was one video where a witness and survivor to the crime said there was a lady in the front area starting fights with people and telling them they were all going to die.  Psychotic?  Or that woman?  (I do not want to be used, so I am not naming names.)  And in all finality, there is going to be an air of mystery about the suspect, Stephen Paddock, because he’s dead.

Let me give you my theory!

First, many men who commit these murders seem to have paranoid personalities, up to being paranoid schizophrenic.  I believe they evade suspicion because they have a version of PS called Delusional Disorder.  The average person with this who comes into an ER is mid 40’s, has hearing problems, and is male.  They have to become extremely ill because they function well, not noticeably different in society.  This may have ties to the brain and the progression of hormones, as the hearing loss suggests these men have loss of hairs in the inner ear that control hearing.  I don’t know exactly what place this fact has in the DD.  You might find this person somewhat unusual.  They say the paranoid factor comes from being unable to live up to the expectations others have of them, and its defense, a Freudian one, that’s gone awry.

But even this doesn’t explain why someone would go to a hotel, break a window and take a machine gun and start shooting.  And I have this dread that I might know someone online who went to that concert.  I always worry!  So, I’m just waiting the usual 24 hours for the police to have all of the information to give to the press.


Out of cohort is a mess.

OMG, it’s terrible to be out of cohort at my school.  I can only take one class per semester, and then I go to the summer in person session and get in to the program, or told no thanks.  I’m terrified to fly there, and feel my health issues might derail getting in anyhow.  My MOTHER is taking sides now, and says she believes I should have done some kind of computer programming or nursing.  Yeah, right.  I am struggling to find ways to hold my interest in the program.  It’s not the coursework, it’s me.  Put me in a spot where I feel I am going to struggle to find work and keep it and I just can’t go forward.  But, what else do you do when you’re a personality theorist wanna be?  Maybe Counseling was the wrong approach and I should have done straight psych with a research school in person!!!


What now?  By the way, guestimates on FB say Jimmy’s in PA in Waymart.  I dunno, it’s just the latest guess from Misty B.

The new case: Kim Wall

Every media outlet is out with the same story the last few days, the recovered sub is being scanned for hidden chambers.   I guess something happened that made him angry, perhaps a refusal to participate in sex, and her try to escape and the deadly fight was done from that kind of fight, and flight behavior.  But, the Madsen fella would have to have a significant chase mode, as in chasing after prey.  I wonder if this dude was a serial killer who hid in his local celebrity?  And the minute she got on that sub, she was Susie Salmon, being led down into an interior underground chamber to play?  (The Lovely Bones, Alice Sebold)  Nah!  Someone would have come up missing before, perhaps plenty of someones.  But the stories in the media about him could point to an Autism Spectrum disorder.

I used to be a reporter, briefly before I decided I would lose everything from making so little money.  Really, in your first years, you almost have to treat it like graduate school and have someone else pay for you.  I never felt afraid of where I went and who I spoke with, but I never put myself in a situation where I could not escape immediately.  I know, it should not be that way, but I have a few bad experiences of my own and my classmates from high school where the guys they were near weren’t trustworthy.  And one of those experiences by a woman named S********, is worthy of a Lifetime movie!  She warned me to always be aware.  She went to a couples home for dinner.  Then they drugged her, played sex games with her, which they photographed, then pushed her out the door half conscious telling her she had “fun.”  S******* called the cops, and they discovered the man was newly married to someone, but had been in prison as a sex offender.  So the couple went to jail.  So I’m pretty scared of being alone with someone I don’t know in a private place.  I simply don’t do it, and I never have.

The Danish police are obviously keeping this case under wraps.

Full Reports

Truth for Morgan

We have received the full 220 page report with supplemental pages.

It is a very large PDF file, so it is being included as an attachment.


*Garfield County redacted personal information of individuals who were found not to be involved. Garfield County also redacted the name of an individual who pursued legal action to have the individual’s name removed from all references to the stalking/murder of Morgan Ingram.

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snippet from NYT

Ms. Wall was last seen on the evening of Aug. 10, when the submarine left Refshaleoen, a former industrial site on the northern edge of Amager Island, on the harbor. Her boyfriend reported her missing the following day, and Mr. Madsen was later arrested. He initially told the police that he had dropped off Ms. Wall on the shore, but later changed his story to say that she had died accidentally and he had buried her at sea.


Kim WallCreditTom Wall, via Associated Press

A cyclist found a torso — missing its arms, legs and head — on Monday, and the remains were identified on Wednesday as Ms. Wall’s.

The police are still looking for the rest of the body. On