Being Christian is a challenge when people do things that aren’t expected, such as kidnapping cats. If I can find out who did it, I can charge them. If not, I can’t. I don’t believe it’s anyone but my next door neighbors. And the heart of my hearts pet cat, Chip, is gone. I am so distressed.
When is a good time to have someone do something so awful to you? This week I have two papers due and I’m already late in getting things written and read. I have to get good grades in both papers, I don’t have any choice. And I don’t have any time to actively be upset, no crying, no mourning, I have to work.
I have two papers and two exams due on the 7th of next month, and no energy to attack them. I’m so dismissive here, on what I’m doing, that I really think I should stop before I finish as I’ve not even done half of it and I’m seriously in debt and the job market looks rougher than ever. My weight gain over the last 20 years and my age, make me an unusual hire, and I’m now guessing that the news I should have taken from the last attempts at job hunting, is that I’m no longer a favorite. Older women are not as prized as younger ones, I get that. But it’s actually true that older women are smarter than their younger counterparts, and more experienced with people and life.
What to do with a counseling masters? I have to get as many A’s as possible to make sure no one has any excuse to say no to licensure. I can see it now, told no to a license to practice and then having to move to any state that will accept me? I like where I am.
**nods head at drama** It’s not really going to go wrong, will it?
I have a whole small spiral notebook of odd sightings at my home, and out when I am shopping. I got stopped for a ticket Wednesday, coming out of Best Buy, and I’m thinking that it’s odd that I was stopped that way. I mean, I did run a right on red, red light that was marked no right on red. The signs are visible during the day, but at night aren’t very visible at all. So, I would like to call Chesterfield county and see if that officer was on the county time clock, or someone else’s. But it’s not a good idea, really.
I don’t know if it’s really a cop, or if it’s someone else parading as a cop, and eventually he’s going to put me in a car, drive me somewhere, and rape and murder me. This person drives a white Lincoln Mercury type sedan, has tinted windows and I believe it’s a he, and he is really big and bulky. I thought they fired or retired cops who got too fat? He was outside of Martins on Forest Hill, in the city last night. I was inside, getting groceries, and he was outside only one spot over from my car. When I saw him, I went back inside to ask the manager to walk me to my car. And as I walked back outside, he was driving off. I didn’t have that camera that I purchased to get a license plate. So, I pointed to the car as it was driving off and the manager went back inside.
I’m sure the manager thought it was kind of strange. And so do I. I don’t have any legal woes that I know of, but I’ve met so many really bad personalities being on the disability, and while I guess that should not be, for me it’s been just so. I think what happens, is that people get that you’re on a slide down the social scale, and it brings out the bully in bullies. They sense it’s hard to defend yourself, and that’s the way it ends, with people hurting you. And the people you knew and loved at work and in that safe, well cared for neighborhood? They’re all gone. That’s why I’m trying hard to get back out there, and do something with the few years I have left to work.
I’ve got to go. I decided to report what has been happening to the person on call about last nights sighting.
I had to put my golden retriever, Lucy, down at age 11 years, 5 months and 11 days just a week ago, and it’s cast a pall over my holiday plans. As far as dogs go, she’s a canine I really miss. She’s irreplaceable, how idiotic that some believe their pets are like China dolls, if you break one, you go back to the store and get another. Nah.
That, and the house, which still needs remodeling, has had me in a state where I do not want to decorate in the slightest. I didn’t buy any tree, nor any ornaments, which I let go of when I moved in 2014. (I wonder should I go on Craigslist and see if anyone has a tree they’re advertising?)I do have family events this season, and need to go shopping today to see if I can find a holiday dress. Oh, well. Off for the year!